Adult Generation Gap

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Ass

We threw a pool party/ barbeque in late August. Invited were our two grown kids and their spouses, daughter Carla & husband Jerry, son Matt & wife Cindy, neighbor couples from each side of us, Phil & Sherry, Jake & Michelle, and our best friends, Joe & his longtime significant other, Sara. I’m Paul and my lovely 52 year old wife is Eloise.

The drinks were flowing freely throughout the afternoon, everyone partaking in their own individual poison and generally having a good time. Music played, the guys had naturally gathered around the grill, talking guy stuff and the women sunned themselves and chatted. Daughter Carla and her hubby Jerry swam in the pool along with next door neighbors Jake and Michelle. This group, with my son Matt and his wife Cindy, was basically all in their early thirties. Phill & Sherry, Joe & Sara and my wife and I made up the ‘over the hill gang’, ranging from early to late fifties.

The grill coals were ready and I went to ask the ladies how they wanted their steaks cooked. As I approached the four sunbathing women, wife Eloise, daughter-in-law Cindy, neighbor Sherry and our best friend Sara. Overhearing a bit of girl talk, I stopped a few feet behind the sunglass and floppy beach hat wearing females and stole a clandestine listen.

Nodding toward the couples in the pool, fifty-two year old Sherry said, “Jesus! Thank God for speedos, check out the butts on those two.” They all tittered in agreement, when Sara piped in with, “Butts be damned! Did ya get a gander of the friggin’ package on Jerry? I gotta think little Carla’s one very happy girl!” “SARA! That’s my son-in-law yer talking about, girl!” Eloise hissed in mock horror. “Yep! And that’s a serious wad I’m talking about too, GIRL!” They all burst out in laughter. Normally quiet and reserved Sherry, my wife’s morning coffee buddy, a bit shaken by Sara’s counter remark, sighed audibly and added, “Alas, dear ladies, we’ll never know. It’s not likely that he’s going to run up here and show us his junk, so just enjoy the sights and let your imagination do the rest.” “Good point, Sherry, for all we know, maybe he’s got a sock rolled up in there.” Sara chuckled.

Cindy, my son’s wife had been sitting there silently and giggling along with her elders. She’d been a little leary of joining the banter, in that the other women were all at least twenty years older than she and she didn’t quite feel in sync. Finally she decided then to put in her two cents and her own giggle, “That’s not a sock, his thing’s like real, for sure.”

Hmmmm, real girl talk, hmmm. I took a few more steps back in hopes that I wouldn’t be seen. Fortunately they were engrossed in the subject and Cindy’s explanation, not at all interested in who might be behind them, yet I could still hear.

The other three all sat up straight and turned toward her inquisitively. Sara taunted her with, “And you know this… HOW?” Cindy began to blush, now that she was the center of attention.

Not wanting to get caught eavesdropping, I looked over my shoulder and said loudly, “I AM GUYS! OKAY! I’m asking ’em now, fer chrisakes!” The hens all snapped around in my directionlooking guilty, as though they’d been caught with their hands in the cookie jar. “Excuse me, m’ladies, but how would you like your meat?” Sara, always primed and ready to mess with me, belted out, “I like MY meat long, thick and hard!” The others all giggled as I was momentarily set back by our slightly innebriated friend’s reply. “The steaks witch! The steaks! HOW DO YOU WANT YER STEAKS COOKED?!?” I barked. They all laughed loudly, attesting to the fact that the booze had loosened up some inhibitons. I got everyone’s orders and called out to the four frolicking in the pool for their preferences as well. Eloise nodded with a smile and said, “That’ll be all, James.” “Thank you m’lady. I’ll summon you when dinner is prepared.” I bowed low and backed away like a good servant. Everyone chuckled and returned to their chat.

I backed up a bit further than I had been when their conversation began and saw that I was no longer in their sphere of attention.

My wife said, “Go ahead girl. As the old saying goes, ‘in for a penny, in for a pound’.” Cindy didn’t know the expression and looked at the rest with a big question mark on her face. Laughing out loud, Sara said, “In other words, kiddo, you’ve opened the can, go ahead and dump out ALL of the worms. SPEAK to us woman! TELL us things!” Turning an even brighter shade of crimson. She figured she’d already said too much but was now stuck. “Well, ummmmm, you remember last summer, Mom, when you guys went on vacation and Carla was watching the house?” She hesitated. Eloise nodded and urged her to continue. “Well, ummmmmm, we, ummmmm, some of Carla’s friends and a couple of our friends, sorta kinda had a party, ummmm like THIS one, while you were gone. YOU said we could use the pool, right?” My wife said, “Yeah honey? No problem, AND?” The females were all ears now. “Ummmm, well we were all drinking and partying tekirda─č escort and stuff, when Sofia, you don’t know her, she said she wanted to go skinny dipping. She didn’t wait for anybody’s okay. She just whipped off her suit and dove in.” Cindy was now in self defense mode, trying to absolve herself of any blame for being naughty.”

Sara guffawed and cackled, “SO? She went skinny dipping, no big deal, finish the story before they get out of the water. We wanna know what Jerry’s got stuffed in his pants!” “Well, ummmmm, okay. I was real shy and didn’t want to, but, Mom, YOUR SON, dropped his trunks and was in the water before I could say no! Everybody was stripping and jumping in and before I knew it I was standing there alone in my bathing suit. I was so embarrassed that I just jumped in and took my suit off in the water.” “And then?” the other three said in unison as if on cue. “So anyway that’s how I saw Jerry’s thing and I don’t wanna say anymore.” Jeeeezussss Christ Girl! What’s his dick like?!? I’m about to go and pull his drawers off myself!” Sara growled. Cindy stammered as the others all waited in prurient anticipation. “Errrrr, well when they were getting out of the water, I was still by the side of the pool, not wanting to get out naked. Jerry hopped out right next to me and stood there drying off. Ummmm, his ummm penis was just hanging and swinging above me and it was pretty big. Ummm, I mean it was like really fat.”

Sara, laughed again, “Ain’t she just prescious? His PENIS? His THING? C’mon girl, it’s a cock! He’s gotta big, fat swingin’ cock!” They all laughed and Cindy blushed even more than before. Sherry murmured, “At least a cock or penis or thing is way better’n a sock.” “Ten-Four on the sock.” My wife added, “Ooops! here they come now. Ix-nay on the ock-cay, girls.” in her best pig latin.

I looked up and saw them approaching and I was stuck there, listening in. I started back toward the beach chairs, pretending to be writing on my notepad and asked very loudly, “Uh Sara, did you say you liked yer meat raw?” Everyone laughed at mouthy Sara being put on the mark, and Eloise actually punched her in the shoulder. “NO ASSHOLE, I SAID… I like my meat long, thick and hard, which definitely leaves YOU OUT!” The tables had been turned on me and now even the guys by the grill joined in on the raucous cheering for Sara. One of the guys yelled out, “WooHoo! Take THAT sucker! Good One SARA! Sara one, cook nada, zip, zero!” The others joined in, hooting and hollering and laughing their asses off.

The four young, wet partiers walked by, drying themselves and headed for the bar. The gossiping hens all eyed Jerry’s bulge approvingly as they passed.

When the steaks were almost ready I called out to Eloise that it was time to get the rest of the food out. She, Sherry and young Cindy jumped to the task while the others, Sara, Carla and Michelle plopped their butts in chairs and started banging their knives and forks on the table, loudly chanting for food. The guys laughed and the three women carrying out the salads, etc., spit out good hearted light obscenities at the three chanting ‘royal bitches’, as they’d now branded them.

Everyone freshened their drinks and sat down to what Sherry referred to as a feast fit for a king. Eloise mentioned that it was appropriate, considering we were dining in the presence of royal bitches. Another round of good natured laughter broke out. Once again proving that the alcohol was doing its job.

Sara finished chewing her last piece of steak and piped up with, “Ya know, although Paul is such a pain in my ass,” “Hahaha, he’s a pain in yer ass? Hahaha, then yer doin’ it wrong, yer majesty!” Michelle taunted Sara. “Hush BITCH! I was gonna compliment him!” The table was in stitches over the banter. “As I was saying before I was SOooooOO rudely interrupted, that for all the pain in THE ass Paul is, he sure as hell can do some magic with a grill and raw meat.”

Everyone nodded in agreement and my son raised his glass in a toast. “Three cheers for the cook!” The group all stood, with glasses raised and shouted a resounding, “HIP HIP HOORAY!” three times. They all sat back down and I rose and took a low exagerrated bow. “At yer service, m’lords and ladies.”

The chuckles settled down when lo and behold, who else but Sara broke the silence with, “Speaking of meat, you seem to have a pretty good sized tube steak there in yer shorts, Jerry. I’ll bet our little Carla here’s damned happy she’s not a damned vegetarian.” She reached around Jerry and patted my daughter on the head.

Most of the gang were shocked by Sara’s boldness and Jerry was instantly, totally red faced. Carla wasn’t rattled for a moment and with a wide grin, reached under the table and obviously grabbing her husband’s equipment, replied, “YEP! And if I WAS a vegetarian, this would’ve made a convert out of me! And oh by the way, THIS fat boy’s all mine so there, BITCH!” Once again the table erupted in tekirda─č escort bayan laughter.

My son Matt, who was getting a little antsy with the conversation, asked if anyone wanted their cocktails refreshed. Every empty glass and bottle was raised, so he and I got up to do bartending duty. As we were mixing drinks and getting the beers and wine, Matt said, “Gee Dad, it’s gettin’ a bit ummm, loose wouldn’t ya say?” I replied, “Hahaha, yeah, I guess. Nobody’s gettin’ hurt, nobody’s gettin’ pissed, everybody’s havin’ fun, so what the hell. Haha, I’ve seen worse.” and paused thoughtfully, ” At least yer mother’s not getting wild, errrr… yet.” He stopped stirring a martini and did the puppy dog thing, head tipping slightly to one side, eyes wide, and said, “Huh?” I just chuckled and nudged him, saying, “Nothing, let’s get these drinks back before they start yelling, ‘off with our heads’.”

When we returned to the table, it was obvious that the conversation had continued to degenerate. The guys were just sitting there and the women were going on about penis sizes and such. It almost seemed that the older gals were trying to outdo each other with their stories, impressing their juniors. The younger girls were somewhat more reserved, ahem, except for my loving daughter, who was right in the midst of the fray.

I figured it was time to get the guys out of the middle of this decidedly female thing and said, “Hey guys! I don’t give a shit about all these wenches’ big dick fantasies. Anyone wanna see my new widescreen TV?”

As all six of us got up and moved away from the table, my buddy Joe saying loudly, “No shit dude, from what I’m hearin’, we must have the smallest dicks these ladies of the court have ever experienced, ‘ceptin Jerry here.” Slapping my son-in-law on the back he said, “Yer our hero dude and I feel SOOOO FUCKING inadequate! Hahaha! c’mon Paul, let’s see that new TV.”

As we walked away chuckling, my wife shouted out, “Yeah, fuckers go away and play with yer weinies!” The whole bunch of females were now out of control with laughter.

Entering the family room, my son asked quietly out of the side of his mouth, “Ummmm Dad, is Mom okay?” I had to laugh and said, “Why son? did she look sick?” He paused and said, “Well ummmm no, but she’s kinda gettin’ a little wild, isn’t she? Maybe she’s had a little too much to drink.” I winked toward the other guys and responded, “Well son, maybe, hmmmm. I’ll tellya what. YOU keep an eye on yer mother and let me know if she gets any, errrr wilder. You did you say wild, right?” The older guys and young Jake our next door neighbor all burst out laughing. Phil agreed with me, “Yeah Matt, YOU keep an eye on HER and let US know if she gets any wilder! Excellent idea! That’s yer new job lad, official mommy watcher!” “Hahaha,” Jake chimed in, “Yeah, watch her long enough and you’ll definitely get a new definition for wild!”

Matt was disturbed and starting to get pissed. That was his Mom these guys were talking about and he wasn’t happy being the butt of their good natured ridicule either. I put my arm around his shoulders an reassured him that the guys were just busting his balls and his mom was a big girl. A big girl that was more than capable of handling her booze, wildness and all. I told him that he was now at an grown up,. .. ooops, adult party and might even see and experience things that he hadn’t before, but not to be worried and just have fun. To that, Jake chided him and the guys all agreed, “Yeah, what yer father said!” Then they did high fives all around and included Matt. Jerry and Matt exchanged glances and shrugged their shoulders, not having a clue what everyone else seemed to understand.

A few minutes passed, when we heard Carla call Jerry’s name. His shoulders slumped as he turned toward the yard and he mumbled, “Now what!” Again my daugter’s voice rang out, “Jerry honey! Would you be a dear and bring us two more bottles of wine…a red and a white, pulleeeez!” He shrugged again and shouted back, “YES M’LADY, RIGHT AWAY M’LADY!” He grabbed the wine from the family room bar fridge and hightailed out the door.

Phil looked toward Jake and said, “WHOA! That boy ain’t too whipped is he?” “No shit man!” Jake retorted. “Hey, when he gets back, let’s all give him the ‘meow… whip slash routine’.” We all laughed and agreed that the kid was in for some serious nut cracking when he returned.

When my son-in-law didn’t make a timely return, I glanced to the covey of females now grouped in kind of a loose circle of chairs and lounges. Jerry was standing there next to my daughter with Sara positioned on his other side.

“Uh Oh!” I exclaimed and quickly flicked the inside lights off saying, “Hey guys c’mere and check this out. I’ve gotta feeling the kid’s not coming back.” The men all moved toward the sliding screen door as their eyes adjusted to the abrupt darkness.

What had caught my eye was Jerry standing there bare assed. His trunks were escort tekirda─č around his ankles and Carla was hefting a really big dick and pair of balls. We couldn’t hear the conversation well but my daughter looked like a sales person showing off some merchandise. It reminded me of a veg-a-matic seller in the mall court, putting on a sales demonstration for a group of passing shoppers.

“Holy shit, Dad! Matt gasped, “What the fuck’s she doing? Mom’s sittin’ right there!” “Gee son, yer right! Sure enough, there she is sitting right there.” Joe jumped in with, “Christ Matt! I thought it was YOUR job to keep an eye on yer mother! You fucked up buddy and now look, yer mother’s sittin’ RIGHT THERE! Why look at her! Out there with Jerry’s cock all stickin’ out and stuff! DAMN! Fuckin’ kids anyway, ya can’t hire ’em, they’ve got no sense of responsibility! No work ethic! Poor Eloise, just sittin’, SITTIN’ RIGHT THERE!”

Matt was in the barrel again and we were all taking shots at him. Putting my hand on his shoulder, I squeezed and said, “I’m sorry son, but I’m afraid I’m gonna have to let ya go. Ya didn’t do yer job so I guess we won’t be needing you anymore.” “Hahaha,” Jake added, “Yeah Matt, yer fired! I’m glad it’s not MY MOM out there, ya know, SITTIN’ RIGHT THERE and shit, having to look at some young guys’s big dick.” Phil erupted in laughter and staggered backwards ’til he tripped and fell over the couch. Joe was laughing so hard, he was bent in two on one knee, holding his stomach with tears actually streami ng down his cheeks. “Oh shit. STOP, STOP! I can’t take anymore! PLEASE STOP! Hahahaha!”

Matt was really pissed now, staring out into the yard, grumbled, “Fine! You bastards! Laugh all you want,… fuckers! Mom may be lookin’ but YER WIFE’S fucking PLAYING with his FUCKING DICK, Joe!”

We all quieted down looking toward the pool. Joe stood up wiping the tears from his eyes, moaning and still holding his belly. He looked out, focused his eyes and sure enough, Sara was stroking Jerry’s prodigious erection. Joe remarked, “Well shit, why am I not surprised that MY SARA would be the first to get involved?” Matt finally felt like he’d been vindicated. Now he’d gotten in a dig and was satisfied that he’d turned the ball busting tables. With a big sigh, Joe added, “Well gentlemen,… it would seem that the party has begun to roll, without us!!”

Matt went flat footed, not having any idea what Joe meant and being a little bummed that his dad’s best friend wasn’t at all upset with the activity in the yard. So much for HIS getting in a shot, putting Joe in the barrel. “Well if nobody else is going to do anything, I’m at least getting my wife outa there and chew Cindy’s fuckin’ ass out! Maybe I’ll give Mom a piece of my mind too!”

“WHOA, WHOA, whoa there young’n! Whoooooaaaa. Hold yer horses!” I said as I grabbed his arm. “Yer not gonna do jack shit!

Matt spun and glared at me stammering, “But, but!” But, but yer ass, Matt! What the fuck is yer major malfunction? It’s just a party, an adult party, and nobody’s gettin’ hurt! Relax boy…RELAX!”

Matt quit trying to pull away from me and I loosened my grip on his arm a bit. “Take it easy son! It’s not like YOU’VE never had a adult party here! Like last summer while you and your sister watched the house… when we went to Hawaii. It was okay when YOU all went skinny dipping, huh? It was okay when that little hottie, Sophia… was it? gave you a blowjob in front of everyone with yer wife passed out in the chair next to you? So YOU just take it easy now, okay?”

He was now in a state of shock. How did his father find out all that stuff? How did he know about the party? Especially how did he know about all the sex and shit? Looking around in the near darkness, he scanned the small group of men and when his eyes met Jake’s, the next door neighbor, just grinned and shrugged his shoulders. Next he looked toward the other neighbor and Phil exploded in laughter.

“Haha kid. Jake called me and told me ’bout the skinny dippin’, so Sherry and I grabbed some wine, went out our front door, walked past the house and into their’s. We snuck out and peeked through the bushes and caught the goings on.”

Suddenly Matt felt like the first time his mother had walked in on him jerking off, just like when he was little kid. He was BUSTED!

Phil continued on, “And then our young neighborhood genius here came up with an idea. He grabbed a ladder, climbed up and re-positioned his security camera over there on the corner of the roof. We all went into his playroom and turned on our own private viewing of YOUR party. You guys got pretty wild. Shit! That cute Latina, Sophia musta sucked off ten guys. While we watched we had a party too. Sherry, my oh so proper wife was on her knees sucking Jake’s cock and I was putting the blocks to his little cutie, Michelle. All the time you were getting a knobber from that Sophia chicquita. We couldn’t believe yer wife was passed out three feet away.”

Joe then piped up with his own shot. “Hey! How cum I missed this little get together, ya fuckers? Hahaha, it ain’t fair, I’m always left out!” We all laughed at Joe’s fake whining and Phil patted him on the head. “That’s okay fella. We’ll send ya an engraved invitation next time the kids have a party.”

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